Writing Your Own History

History has a way of putting things in perspective that is very hard to achieve in the short term.  An event in your life that seems catastrophic this week pales in comparison to the events over a decade of time.  And no matter how hard you try to manage and control the story, some events will alter your history whether you like it or not.

Take for example my divorce back in the early 90's.  I was devastated.  My whole wonderfully-planned life as I had planned came crashing to a halt when it collided with my husband's newly-planned life.  I described it as the end of a chapter, and yes, still today...almost 20 years later, I still think the "D-word" event represents a chapter in my life story.  Maybe the chapter isn't as lengthy or as meaty as I may have once thought because there are other juicier stories in my personal history story now.

And maybe President Obama will get off his fat, pompous ass and take on the responsibility of a comprehensive immigration program and the American public will understand exactly why Governor Brewer was left with little choice than to try to make things better in Arizona by signing the 1070 bill into law, thus forcing the Federal government to do its job. If he was successful in an election year, history would be kind to him for placing the public good over partisan politics.

History is funny, too, because no matter hard you try to affect what your history, you cannot.  I have tried to paint as nice a picture on the whole divorce topic for a myriad of reasons, but when I am dead and gone, there is little I can do.  The story lies in the facts and the outcomes surrounding the event.  Obama should understand that even as eloquent as he speaks, the actions are really the only things that matter when it comes to history.

So what can you do to affect your history?  I'd say that the best thing to do is to try to always look in the long-term and what the big picture shows and to do what's best in these terms.  Be faithful to yourself and what you believe in, no matter what the consequences.  But, always be willing to listen and learn from others and thus, be able to change your beliefs and who you are inside. 

One can only hope that our poiliticians can be big boys and girls and do the hard things such as comprehensive immigration reform and once and for all have a system that works.  The history books are waiting.............................................

A Preview of Worth Collection Preview

Image by iceman9294 via Flickr

Image via Wikipedia

I had the pleasure of attending the Annual Worth Collection Preview event, held in New York City in June.  My sister and I went together so it's pretty much a given that the trip would be a blast.   The event is held at the Waldorf Astoria.  Our room was huge which was a nice plus.  No view but who cared...the best view was all the gorgeous Worth Sales Associates running around inside the building!  They offered a tour of the hotel for $60 but we wisely chose to use that money at the hotel bar instead!


The event lasts several days and includes a fashion show and workshops on the clothes, how to sell them correctly and you meet with your region sales associates, too.  The presentation is well done and everyone takes the clothes and their businesses seriously.

The Fall clothing line is beautiful...rich.....stylish...chic!  I love fall clothes....always have.

And I really love how they take dressy evening clothes and make them easy-to-wear and comfortable.  Take this simple black top, add this beautiful gold long skirt and finish off with this amazing wrap and you look fantastic!

I also love their selection of jackets, which seems to be their specialty.  I like this shorter reddish houndstooth jacket. It will be perfect to wear to this year's Parent's Weekend at Dickinson College.

And, I know I will select one of their new handbags because they are smaller which I prefer to the huge shopping bag style.

Of course, it wasn't "all work and no play" at the Worth preview! In fact we managed to close up the bars along Central Park south one of the evenings.  I remember asking why on Earth was the kitchen closed when the hostess said, well we always close the kitchen at 2 am, Ma'am!

  

One evening we spent time with some of Worth's best sales people (thinking we might get them drunk enough and then they'd tell us their secrets to success!) But, they were so nice, they gave us tips right away.  That's one common denominator I found with the Worth associates....everyone was genuine and friendly and helpful.  No cat fights in this group.  Isn't that refreshing to hear?  

One evening, June and I stepped across the street to eat on the outside patio of St. Bart's Church.  I would highly recommend  this place to anyone visiting the big City!

I have no idea why we decided to order dessert as a takeout item to eat back in the room, but it seemed like a good idea at the time!

Would I attend the annual event again next year?  You bet I would, only this time, I would like to be one of those sales associates that get rewarded for their sales effort, ie, sell a LOT more clothing items!  Feel like helping me and my sister out?  Email me at beth@emtnester.com and I can take you to their cool select shopper site to look at and to order your Fall Wardrobe.  I buy all my items online and you can too, you just need me or June to place the order.  To visit the Worth website, go here....

Political Ranting From a Different Perspective

Today, I would like to introduce you to my mystery guest.  The person has a political angle that is always interesting and though-provoking. Because of the high-profile position this person has, their identity must be kept a secret.  And their views may or may not be similar to my own.  But, who wants to read only posts that are exactly like their own all the time?  How can your political mind expand and learn anything that way?  I know you will enjoy this first guest post........

What was Jan thinking?

Unlike most of my Republican friends, I didn’t want Governor Brewer to sign SB 1070, the anti-illegal immigration boogeyman that continues to frighten good citizens everywhere.  Its not that I’m soft on illegal immigration. Rather, I just don’t like to aggravate liberals and do-gooders.  There is nothing more dangerous to the cause of freedom than a do-gooder with a cause.  And SB 1070 has brought them out of the woodwork by the thousands.  Along for the ride of course are the political and economic opportunists who are now taking free shots at Arizona in order to establish their own civil rights bona fides and hopefully steal our All Star and BCS games, not to mention our tourists and convention business.  These political tick birds get to sucker punch us because no matter what the facts are, America loves to have someone to hate on.  And for now at least, that someone is Arizona.

Oh sure, there are people coming to our defense, or trying to.  But too often the voices of our defenders, the ones carefully and adversely selected by the media, have a hillbilly drawl or are wearing a gun or, even worse, are the good sheriff himself – Joe Arpaio.  That guy gets on TV more than a BP exec and is equally unconvincing.  If you had to select a single person to go on national TV and discuss the how and why of SB 1070’s passage, to explain that really, after all, most of what it does is already allowable under Federal law or to admit, as few are willing to do, that its provisions are not as groundbreaking as its critics and supporters allege, or to put in perspective the frustrations of a state long ignored by the Federal government, better a horse tapping out Morse code with its hoof than Joe Arpaio.  Repeating over and over how he is going to keep doing what he’s doing no matter what the Justice Department’s Civil Rights Division says is not the best way to convert the masses.

I think Jan should have vetoed the bill.  If only because it was a Pearce Bill.  Who signs anything from Russell Pearce anyway?  She should have vetoed the bill and blamed President Obama for it.  And while she was at it, blamed Janet Napolitano too.  Immigration, after all, is a uniquely Federal responsibility and Obama and Napolitano are uniquely responsible for it.  If the immigration situation in Arizona is in disarray, why should the Governor have to solve the problem?  Given the tremendous amount of national attention that preceded her signing of the measure, a veto would have been equally newsworthy, especially if it were accompanied by a promise to call a special session to re-pass the bill if Washington did not get busy doing its job. 

Giving Obama and Napolitano a specific length of time, such as 60 days, to do their jobs would have allowed Jan to own the political high ground, highlighted Washington’s indifference to our problems and given us an elevated platform from which to demand the same level of border security afforded California and Texas.  Brewer could have used the SB 1070 boogeyman as leverage, while looking like the reasonable and able person she is.  At the end of 60 days, she would either be signing a popular and populist bill or taking credit for securing the border.  Either way, she wins.

Finding the Suit that Fits You

Yesterday I broke down and did the dreaded bathing suit shopping event.  Due to some weight loss and the fact that most of my swimsuits are at least 3 years old, none of my suits have enough elastic to hold up while swimming.  So, I head to a store in the Borgota and find out that it's gone...closed!  Apparantely, they had lots of loyal shoppers like me.

So, I head to the very chic Scottsdale Fashion Square that's just down the street and realize I have on no make-up and I have forgotten to brush my hair today.  It's probably better to look your best when entering the horrible dressing room horror chambers.  But I forgot, so I walk into the mall feeling like a just stepped off the bus from the farm, ready for my big day at the City shopping center. 

I have read about the monokinis which sound like half disease-half drink and I have decided this just might be my type of bathing suit.  The cute girl helping me through this tortured affair thinks this Juicy Couture suit will look GREAT on me.  I grab about 45 other suits and reluctantly take the one (shown on the left). 

The next process I know every person reading this goes through.  I call it the 'Goldie Locks routine'.......this one is too small, this one I am falling out of, this one forgot we have bottoms....you know!  The dressing room looks like a tornado hit it and bathing suits are flying.  My helper cheerfully grabs the rejects and each time asks about the monokini, which is somewhere at the bottom of the heap.

Now, every suit I have selected is very different in style and color, but when I look into these trick mirrors, I see this....(insert picture to the right).  How does that happen?


And the weird thing is, I start to think I look cute...

Finally, I try on the monokini and she's right, it's not bad.  And by 'not bad', I mean I could wear this in public and it is purchasable. My helper is smiling with the 'I told you so' smirk and I buy it, the matching cover-up and another suit that looks like crap on me, so its going back.  (The blue one-piecer was my back-up suit if i got home and had second thoughts). Next, I head to Nordstrom's to find a suit for my backyard.  In case you are not aware, it's so hot here in the summer that the less material your suit has, the better.  So, I plan to get a two-piece.  I think it's hysterical, but now that I am over 50, I have started calling bikinis, 2-piece suits....like that's more age-suited.  

Anyway, I find this cute navy blue suit and cover that's comfortable and just like this model in the picture, the minute you put it on, you suddenly become all sultry and sexy and you cannot get the 'come-hither' look off your face.  I have no idea why this happens....I am just warning you ahead.

Well, I am done.  I go home and plan out my exercise routine for the next few weeks. It's amazing how deflating swimsuit shopping can be to your psyche.......

I

 

Nadal Is My Facebook Friend

Relationships are so important in life that you need to grab them whenever and wherever you can.  They enrich your life, teach you to be a better person and generally make life worth living.  Personally, I cherish the people that surround my life.  My family is ultra-important to me and I would bend over backwards for all of them.  I have my "dog friends" where our common denominator is that we dolt over our four-legged family members together.   I have work friends, past Phoenix Cotillion board member friends, friends from my kids school and sports teams, I have church friends and the list goes on and on. 

But my newest "friends" are my Facebook friends.  Some are people I went to high school with.  A few I actually knew and hung out with during the 70's, but many are people who had the good sense to steer away from me in the 70's.  It would be hard to actually label what I was like back then....not really smart enough to be a geek, not really liked enough to be popular....words like awkward, weird, odd come to mind.  I don't think I had grown into my shoes yet, so to speak.  That happened in college and beyond for me.  Nevertheless, I love to talking to and hearing about these high school classmates lives' now. 

One of my newest "friends" is Rafael Nadal...you know...the tennis player.  Yeah, we are good buds.  In fact, he just sent me a video clip and although it's not in English, I am pretty sure that loosely translated, he's saying, "thanks to his new older, American Facebook friend, Beth Southworth, that he was able to pull out that last third set to make it to the French Open finals!!"  He was smiling and was wearing that adorable three-colored shirt that I told him he looked HOT in.  We are almost an item now, except I love my husband and all. 


The bottom line for relationships is that you just have to be completely honest and forthcoming about what's what between two people.  You have to give as much of yourself (...call me, Rafael!) and be helpful and useful to the other person.  And then you will be living a life worth living.

How Easily Your Life is Changed

The day is marked on our calendars as the day all life as we knew it had changed for the worst.  And just like that, with little pomp or circumstance, we tried to pick up the pieces of our ruined lives as best we could.  For we are a strong family with a deep foundation to weather any kind of storm that lays in our path.  Yet, we have come to the brink of our capacity with this single action that was inflicted upon us.  And each week, we sign a little harder and longer with no end in sight and no where for the pain to go.....

 



Friday night, 5:30 pm, one painful year ago..........................

I make the weekly call to our favorite pizza restaurant, Three Tomatoes and a Mozzarella, and the line is silent.  No message.  No explanation of why they aren't answering the phone to take my pizza order that we will pick up, just like the last 300 Fridays in a row!

Panicked, we drive over to the restaurant. It's dark and there is a sign on the door.  We worry that someone has been in an accident but we were unprepared for what we were about to read.........."We are closed for good due to poor negotiations with the landlord", or some such nonsense.  I can hardly read the words as my heart was pumping at an unsafe, fast rate.   It says to please visit their westside restaurant, only 45 minutes away.  How convenient!

Now, we knew the owners, all the employees and just about everything about them.  Yet, without a simple call, they have vanished from our lives.  We try to pick up the pieces.  We try every pizza joint within 15 minutes of our house.  None are even close to the perfect crust, fresh ingredients, not to mention a delicious tomato mozzarella salad from this wonderful little restaurant!  I told myself I was not going to cry when I wrote this post, but it's just TOO hard.  Why does life throw us these awful curves when we are so vulnerable? 

They are a franchise....so maybe we should buy one and put it very close to our house.  It's only $35,000 and restaurants are so easy to run and are often times profitable, right?  But the new place would have to be an exact replica of our family room, because we like to take the pizza home, drink our own wines and watch a movie.  Maybe our place could do that for a bunch of strangers. 

For now, we must suffer until we can figure this major life change.  I hope you and your family never have to go through such agony.  I would not wish this on my worst enemy!  I hope our marriage can stay tight.  (Maybe Al and Tipper had something like this happen to them....who really knows the true story?)  Wish us luck....