A Sidewalk Chalk Story

It's 4:20 am and like any respectable empty nest parent, I am WIDE awake and looking for things to do.  Yes, unfortunately I have fallen back into the 3-5 am wake up pattern my body seems to love so much.  So, tonight, I have stumbled into one of my children empty rooms to organize............there's always a corner or closet that needs help.  Laura's room is no exception. 

The corner behind her guest day bed is a treasure trove worth of items to organize........I discover a new purse she's never, ever going to use.......I will take it to Goodwill.  There are Christmas balls left over from when she decorated her room from last Christmas...............I will move them into the garage with all the other holiday decorations.  And then I see an odd looking white plastic bag.  It holds  a collection of sidewalk chalk.  The bag is tattered from all the years she would drag the bag out to the driveway to create her masterpieces.  Her sidewalk chalk was probably her favorite playtime activity from ages 4-8.  She's now 21, so who knows why this bag is sitting lodged in the corner of her room now.  I open it up and discover there are at least 12 different pieces in a variety of colors and lengths.  I can see that blue was her favorite because they are the most worn.  She loved the ocean even back then and many a night I would come home from work only to find waves and a beach welcoming me.

I was fortunate enough to have a fantastic nanny who was artistically talented.  Being artistically challenged (remind me to tell you about this weekend's craft project and the kitchen chairs.....), I really appreciated Darcy covering me in the arts projects!  The sidewalk chalk was used to create whole villages or beach scenes and once I arrived home to find the whole Phoenix Suns team laying on my driveway. But my most favorite sidewalk chalk story came on a weekend some 16 years ago......................

I was dating Bill #2....(now husband) and he was extremely helpful around my house.  I lived in a wonderful neighborhood called Arcadia and I had a charming house.  And when I say charming, I mean falling apart.  The windows needed to be replaced.  The carpet was getting dingy and the cedar roof was leaking and would soon need replacing....(hence, the move to North Scottsdale).  It was a beautiful Fall day, and we were all busy doing projects outside around the house.  The boys were playing next door as was often the case when work outdoors was being done.  But Laura was tagging along "helping" us with the weekend chores.  I had decided to tackle the gigantic oleander bush along the side of the house and along the street.  I suggested that during this task it would be best if Laura followed Bill around for awhile.  Bill decided that he needed to do some work on the roof along the edges.  It was a one story home but the roof was filled with branches and debris from the large trees on the property.  Laura followed him along the grass and talked to him as he worked....sidewalk chalk in hand. 

Now, as the story goes, somehow Bill managed to fall off the roof and knocked the wind out of himself.  He landed about 3 feet from where Laura was playing.  She ran over to him and said, "Hey, Bill, what are you doing"......no answer......"are you okay?"........no answer..........."are you dead?".......Bill attempt to muster an answer, but he is in pain and cannot seem to speak........."because if you are dead, I will write your name on the wall with my sidewalk chalk!"  She proceeds to get up and start writing 'BILL' on the brick siding of the house.  Bill looks up and with a grin on his face, says, "I'm not dead Laura, come help me up!"

If you are a parent of young children, I highly recommend you go get some sidewalk chalk.  Sure your driveway will be a mess 90% of the time, but it is so worth it!  And I am ready to go back to bed now, but I decide I should take this chalk down to our great nephew's house so he can make a mess of his Mom's or Grandmom's driveway.  I also think I will save the largest blue piece of chalk to keep in Laura's room.............

(I am participating in the Ultimate Blog Challenge this month)

Changing Up the Routine As An Empty Nest Parent

It's been three years, one month, four days, three hours and  forty-seven minutes since my youngest child left the house, but who's counting? I hardly even noticed that all three children have left the nest with apartments of their own...they now call 'home'................................

Some things may have altered just a tiny bit, though.  I cannot remember the last time I bought the industrial-sized Bagel Bites that required pinching the corners to be able to fit into my freezer or the milk carton container of goldfish snacks.  I no longer think I should own stock in the Gatorade company.  I do all my laundry on off-peak hours now; there are no more emergency laundry requests.  Curfews have no place in our house anymore.  We go back to bed at 9 pm and sleep as long as our bodies allow us to.

If I was totally honest with you (and why would I be any other way?!), I would tell you the house has a morgue-like atmosphere most of the time.  Music isn't blaring and there is no yelling anymore except on the occasions when Wrigley is whining and disturbing the deafening silent of the household! No giggles or out right laughter is heard like when my boys would be quizzing their sister and finding her answers to be hysterical.  I have finally heard a whole song been played on the car radio before someone has switched the channel. 

I don't ever push or shove my husband around like my sons would do to settle an argument.  No, the only sounds that resonant through the house are the occasional UTube video being shared on the computer or the constant drone of the television reporters reporting about one chaos after another in the world.



Life hasn't stopped since the kids up and left their nurturing nest.  In fact, we have never been busier, at least in our work situations.  It's just very different.  And sometimes I enjoy the changes and sometimes I hate the changes. 

My advise to new parents experiencing the empty nest arrangement is to every once and awhile, try to recreate the atmosphere you had with the children, at least the good parts.  Put some goldfish in a big bowl on the coffee table and turn on the stereo full blast instead of falling into the evening's "regular routine".  Be playful with your partner. Call the kids and talk over the loud music.  Tell them that you are thinking of them and that you love them.